<20hp 100sp 99st> 0 0 -1 sc
Bonehead in Perplexed Otter bar. Drink many ale. Learn how be BEST warrior very hard. Bonehead need break. Bonehead drink with skinny elf friend Yahoo, Dark elf friend Rezah, and tiny halfling Uwe. We very bored. Yahoo say we should go explore place call Winterborn Mansion. Yahoo say it very scary place, but maybe have good shinies for us find. Bonehead say want know more about place first. Yahoo say Human Wizard name Alpheus Winterborn live there before, do bad magic, now many bad magic things live there. Bonehead bored, so, say ok. Rezah and Uwe come too. Bonehead think best idea from from when bored and think in bar.
Bonehead at Bar. Think about Ogre Phantum borrow shinies, not give back. Bonehead think next time not let fall for other Ogre tricks, make Bonehead look dumb. Bonehead hear yelling, want know why. Bonehead go outside, See strange woman yelling. Say she Turkey Huntress. Woman say say turkey escape from meat shop, and now hurt people. Say she give reward for people find turkey and kill, bring back proof. Bonehead think this good, so, Bonehead go hunt turkey.
Bonehead in Ogre rest. Good bar. Bonehead fit in chair. Bonehead see woman ogre. Big. strong. Good size for make Ogre baby. Bonehead go, say "Hi, me Bonehead!" She say she name Etus. She woman warrior. Very brave. Etus say Bonehead no look strong. Bonehead say he STRONG HUNTER! Etus say maybe if Bonehead help kill Hydra, she believe. Bonehead say ok. Etus say village of tellerium have problem with hydra monster near, and that they want hydra dead, pay many shinies. Bonehead say ok. Etus say Bonehead use hunting skills, find Hydra, and then wait in tellerium. Etus say she get other help kill hydra, because hydra big, and strong! Bonehead say ok.
Bonehead use magic sit stick from Ogre chief Bentnose to go to Tellerium. Bonehead No like Boat. Bonehead no like gnome Metal worm thing. Too small for Bonehead. Bonehead walk through forest, and walk through grass, spend much time look for hydra home. But, Hydra can no hide from Bonehead! Bonehead BEST hunter, and find Hydra den. Bonehead then go back to tellerium, wait at bar.
Etus woman come back with friends, say they help kill Hydra. First is other Ogre, name Doktor. me no like Doktor. Doktor sound dumb. Not make good babies with Etus like Bonehead. Then tiny small thing, name Pigpin. Bonehead think Pigpin too small for come, but Etus say Pigpin help, very sneaky. Bonehead think Pigpin only good for step on, but, Bonehead say ok. Last be Dragon thing call Mizuchi. Mizuchi look like make good warrior. Bonehead say ok. Etus ask Bonehead if Bonehead find Hydra. Bonehead say yes. Etus ask where Hydra...but, Bonehead forget. Etus hit Bonehead. Hurt. Bonehead say will find again. Bonehead find ogre tracks, and follow. Ogre tracks lead to Hydra! Bonehead very lucky.
We go down in Hydra den, and Mizuchi and Etus do many talking. Bonehead no understand lots. We find ticky tock thing, and turn off. Then, we go in room, fight MANY crab things. Make Bonehead very tired. But, Bonehead have good party, so, Bonehead be ok. find hurt dracon. Mizuchi say is why he come, help other dracon soldier. Bonehead say ok. Soldier say xorn monster block way to Hydra, so, we all fight Xorn. Very hard fight. Xorn monster STRONG! Bonehead SMASH! many time, use hunter magic, but, no work. Bonehead use hunter trick, set Xorn thing on fire. All others fight good, mighty warriors. Pigpin thing almost get step on, but, fight ok too. We kill xorn, and then we rest.
Bonehead in bar, thirsty. Fly around in ticky tock thing too long. Bonehead listen people talk. Say smelly shaman outside village. No go way! People say want Odius shaman go way. Bonehead say ok, Bonehead will do. They laugh at Bonehead. say Bonehead cannot fight alone! Bonehead STRONG! But, maybe Bonehead bring others, in case. Bonehead find others willing come. One, Seze, fey thing. Drink Blood. She use brain-think magic. Bonehead get confuse when Seze try explain. Bonehead also find a Shark thing, Dory. She warrior from shark people. These good. We go to Odius place!
We find place where Odius shaman hide. But, many portals. Not know which one need go through. ask all what want do. They say we all be together, go in one by one. Bonehead say ok. We go in portal, but, portal room have strange imp thing. We fight! Bonehead see Seze use brain magic. Very strong, but, Bonehead still think Ogre Hunting magic best. No need think so hard. Imp thing fight hard, but, we smash. Bonehead rest after fight, tell shark thing dory she need lead. Warrior need lead so I can use hunter magic. Dory say she will do, so, she lead us on.
Go in next portal. Find demon thing trapped. We smash! fight go much better when dory lead fight. Bonehead able to use hunter magic. make demon die quickly. We all happy. Say when we find Odius shaman, he will be SMASH easy!
Finally find smelly shaman. Shaman not so smelly. Bonehead think shaman smell fine. Bonehead look at Seze and Dory, they look sick, start gag. Bonehead do not understand. But, Bonehead will get many shiny for get rid of shaman, so, Bonehead will do. I give out magic stick I find in big riga tower, throw ball of fire. Will help with Shaman. I also take out good luck magic toy. Ma give me toy after she use head as club. Say "Bonehead, here a nice thing. Keep around when you in trouble. will keep safe!" Bonehead say ok Ma. Bonehead favorite toy. Sometimes, get BIG, fight with Bonehead, use toy magic. Now, we ready to fight!
We attack shaman! Shaman no like, use magic to blow air at us! I use my hunter magic, and seze his brain magic, to hurt smelly shaman, but, Odius is a STRONG shaman. He cast many spell, some hit Seze, hurt Seze bad. I BASH Odius shaman when he cast, maybe stop him from case. Dory do this also. She quick warrior, shaman have hard time hit her, but, his magic strong. He have magic ring, always glowing when his magic no work. We take tuns, go in and out, fighting wizard head to head. Bonehead STRONG! Smelly shaman magic no hurt Bonehead so much. Dory help seze back up, and seze use brain magic again. Bonehead lucky toy get big, help also! We all fight, cast many spells! Fire, ice, wind, all around us, But Bonehead no see. Bonehead focus on bash and kick shaman when he cast spell, no hurt friend Seze and Dory! Finally, we SMASH Shaman. Strange magic happen when he die. POOF we in room. room have books for bonehead read. many other strange thing. we all happy!
We go back Sigil Village, happy we win against smelly shaman. We each go our own way, maybe one day fight together again. Bonehead worry though. If Humans kill each other just for smell bad, one day they might think Bonehead smell bad. Bonehead think smell fine. Think Odius shaman smell fine. Bonehead think human things in sigil not ok in head. Think Maybe soon time leave Sigil Village, explore more of world, before they try hunt Bonehead for smell...
Pyrian help Bonehead write story! Bonehead learn many thing to be BEST Ogre Hunter! Learn Hunter magic! Learn Hunter trick! Bonehead still like smash better. Vendredi say time Bonehead go to Big tower, use what Bonehead learn. Bonehead say ok. Vendrededi tell Bonehead find many shiny black rock. Bring back. Bonehead say ok. Bonehead find human thing, say take Bonehead to Tower. Man want shinies. Bonehead say he will SMASH! Human use stupid magic on Bonehead! But, Bonehead so strong, human magic send Bonehead to tower place! Stupid human always want shinies.
Bonehead walk to Tower. Find small Gnome thing. Gnomething say he will help Bonehead get back to Sigil Village. Bonehead say ok, and walk pat Gnome thing. Bonehead no like Gnome things. Always make silly ticky tock thing. Bonehead no like Ticky Tocks.
Bonehead climb tower. Very dark. Bonehead no scared. Bonehead see many rooms. Bonehead find Human things, but have wings! They no like Bonehead, try smash Bonehead. Bonehead SMASH them! Bonehead find many winged things, many dead things that walk. Find other ones who want gold. All attack Bonehead. Bonehead SMASH ALL!
Bonehead in sigil, learning to bes GREAT hunter. Bonehead get thirsty, go bar. Drink ale. Bonehead listen people talk. Boatman say dragon in Aroxa, by Village of Tellirium. Say Village no help Aroxa. Bonehead bored, so, Bonehead decide he go, kill dragon. Bonehead get on boat, fo Aroxa!.
Bonehead get to Aroxa. Very quiet. Elf come from tree, say to Bonehead that princess need save. Bonehead say ok. Give Bonehead key. Bonehead try find way inside castle. Many burned dead around. Bonehead can no cross bridge. Lizard thing with many heads attack Bonehead. Bonehead smash. Bonehead find tall statue thing. Elf in forest say it "Obelisk". Look like need put something inside. Bonehead think maybe that how get inside. Bonehead shake elf, elf say he think bat has piece. Bonehead get go in cave, kill MANY bats, find piece. Put in obelisk thing. door open. Bonehead go in, only see wall. Bonehead get mad, smash wall. Smash light holder off wall. Secret door open!
Bonehead now inside Aroxa. Troll attack bonehead, but, Bonehead BEST hunter. Bonehead kill troll with spear. Kill many slimy things. Bonehead find kitchen. Bonehead eat many food. Bonehead find button. Bonehead push. Bonehead see open door go under kitchen, so, Bonehead go down. Bonehead see nothing, but, Bonehead hear breathing from other side of dirt. Bonehead dig. Bonehead find old man. Old man say he Chief of Aroxa. Say save his daughter. Bonehead say already saving princess, Bonehead cannot save both at same time. Old man say his Daughter is Princess. Bonehead dont know how can be both, but, Bonehead say ok, and leave old man alone.
Bonehead explore more of tower. find VERY shiny chair. Bonehead think maybe take chair, leave tower. No need kill dragon if Bonehead have BEST chair. Bonehead try lift chair, but, cannot move. Bonehead try again and again. But, Bonehead hear a *click* and door open. Bonehead go in door. In room only old book. Bonehead take book. Maybe use for toilet. Before Bonehead leave, Bonehead look up, see door. Bonehead open door, go up. Bonehead find preatty jar. Bonehead take. Maybe use for water. Bonehead leave room, back to chair. Bonehead mad he cannot take chair. Bonehead will talk to princess person, ask for chair.
Bonehead make Hunter Pyrian help write. Bonehead leave Rune forest, go south. Find Big Village of Rune. Many human things there. Bonehead do not like. They all give Bonehead funny looks. Bonehead find other ogre, name Raksann. He say he help Bonehead if Bonehead do "Guard Duty" Bonehead say ok. Bonehead stand in front of jail. Very boring. Before Bonehead can leave, 2 sidhe things attack! Bonehead smash. Raksann say Bonehead do good. Say Bonehead talk to human Meru. Bonehead say ok.
Bonehead make Druid write more. Bonehead explore forest. Very big. Many strange thing. Find man by bridge, not troll. Stupid man ask Bonehead question, no let Bonehead cross. Bonehead smash man and cross anyway. Bonehead find dark forest. Very Scary. Many things fight bonehead. Bonehead go further in, find dead things that walk. Bonehead not like dead things, so Bonehead come back forest. Bonehead find small goblin. Goblin try follow Bonehead, so, Bonehead smash. Bonehead meet small elf from wolf tribe. He ask Bonehead join his tribe, help save forest from other tribe. Bonehead say ok. Forest is nice.
Me Bonehead! Make druid in Rune Forest write story! Bonehead MIGHTY Hunter! Bonehead grow in Ogre Village, far from here. When Bonehead a small ogre, Ma take Bonehead out to learn hunt. Ma find Longtooth pack, but they attack! Ma break club, and Bonehead get scared. But, Ma take Bonehead by foot, and use Bonehead to hit away longtooth! Ma say this why Bonehead no think good. Ma try teach Bonehead how hunt, for good of Village, But, then Ma grow old, die. Other Ogre in Village say Bonehead go away, Go to Lasler, and "Go be stupid there!". Bonehead show them. Bonehead will be STRONGEST Ogre!
So, Bonehead come Lasler. Bonehead run into many people, tell Bonehead what do. say "Bonehead, smash this!" or "Bonehead, smash that!" So, Bonehead smash. Bonehead smash many things in Lasler. Bonehead smash tiny rock thing. Talking statue. Talking tree. Bonehead smash mean man in shiny armour. Bonehead smash Big Crab when Bonehead get hungry! Village say "Bonehead, go smash Dragon!" So, Bonehead walk, find dragon on cliff. Very big, Very mean. But, Bonehead smash, all by himself, like rest! Bonehead smash so many things in lasler, village get mad, Kick Bonehead out!
Now, Bonehead in big Rune Forest, with Druid. Will look for new things smash.
Bonehead done talk now.